Archive for June 2009

Fallin'

I'm tired of that man. What gives him the right to talk to me.
So, your part of the reason I'm alive. I didn't ask for that.
And you know what you did, so don't get so cute and think you have the right to speak to me when you don't. Not until you apologize for all you done.
And even then I won't accept you, I'll just kick you away like yesterday's newspaper.
So you drove me to school because a science test, big whoop! I could have walked, but I would have been SUPER late. Just because you did that favor for my mom, who ask, doesn't mean you can talk to me. And since I said thank you for the ride that should be it, for you didn't say a darn thing. Now just shut up and go back your nagging the other ones. I'm not your child, or don't you remember, you DISOWNED me.

Sorry, I had to rant and since this is my own private blog, I think I'm obligated to do so.

Happiness

I swear the world is unfair. I moved back into my sister's bedroom yesterday, we'll see how long this last. Last time, I didn't even stay a month in her room.
All my activities for yesterday was:
*Work on novel
*fix computer
*Suffer from post-non computer syndrome.
*Get up the urge to work on incomplete fanlistings.

Now back to why the world is unfair, my mom would give some fake prophet money than her daughter to get her own hair done, this is really terrible. She always does this. That lady usually take 100 dollars or more while I only need 21.99 or 30 dollars top.
I hate this world at times.

Shine More

Yesterday, after the test I had a very peculiar day. I had an urge to go and look my horoscope after trying to look for an idol's horoscope for a site, I'm working on. I read my horoscope and the person whom wrote knows me too well. They even got the word I hate so much correct, "Selfish". Even though I'm not, I just dislike the word. Um, oh, and I had a very weird dream last night. I was having a birthday party, just the regular birthday party with a few of my old friends-some I don't even like...and sitting across the room is Sho Sakurai. This was weird because it was suppose to be a friend party. I think my mom was suppose to surprise me, so all I did was just bow my head and he returned it. Then I lead my friends upstairs. They began gossiping and I got tired and went to bed, when I woke up, I went downstairs and he was still there, so I tried to speak some Japanese to him (which was hard) and he understood and came upstairs to hang out with me and my friends, and that's it.
That's a weird dream. The only think it inspired me to do is take my language studies seriously or pay attention. And maybe learn some Japanese. But all at the end, I had this nagging feeling that I wasn't wearing any pants on...

No? or Yes?

I wish you guess knew how sad I am...I just found out that I won't be taking the test in science. I can only take it in August. I'm really upset, you don't know how mad I am. I should have just gone to see him and get the labs that were due. Oh my goodness, I'm so upset. On that day, I went to go see my sister give birth. My sister should take responsibility! But I know she won't and in a way she shouldn't have to...

RESCUE

Hey, do you forgive me? I mean I haven't wrote to you for a while. It's ok if you hate, I hate myself currently. Waeyo? Because...of many different reason.
First, I'm now currently back into fanlistings. So, I work hard on them. Liking fanlisting is now the reason why I'm burden with 6-5 of them that are due all next week or the week after that.
Second, because I'm so obsessed with managing my fanlistings, I have no time to study,watch dramas or do anything I want anymore, it's taking over a big chuck? of my life. But, I really should study for I have Health test and History all on Monday.
Thirdly, my sister just had her baby that I careless missed school for. I regret it now. That baby cries all day and night-I have no problem with this. Just the fact that my sister is a mom now really just irks me altogether. As you might have read earlier I never approved of her being pregnant. Now, that her actual baby is here, I'm highly annoyed. Today, I made a stupid comment such as: "Monique, where is your baby? Did you kill it?"-I was playing around. Obviously, she didn't think so and yelled at me. Well, sorry, I thought I was still talking to my old sister who use to laugh at everything I once said and did and mock me hopelessly.
Fourthly, my dreams are getting weirder and weirder. I love Aiba,Jun and Sho from Arashi-alot. But currently the only one I see in my dream is Sho. It's really weird because he's very similar to me in many ways, so is liking someone like myself boring,bad,good?
Fifthly, Today my brother got in trouble for me. This is minor since I always get in trouble for him, once even choked into I fainted. But anyway, so my sister asked me: "Did I have Oreo icecream". I answer no, because I really only have cookie dough icecream but I did mixed one or two scoops of oreo in it, but I didn't have all oreo (which I thought she meant). So, she hops over to my brother and which she knows he had oreo icecream tells him to clean out the cup in which I ate my icecream out of. I felt remorseful for him and very depressed after I heard him complaining later about to my younger sister. They now share a room, so yup she not in this room anymore,yay!
Well, I think I'm going to go pack it in and go get prepared for tomorrow's long studying session. And maybe during my breaks think of Sho (^_^) and of course Aiba and Jun!

Crazy Moon

I think I'm losing my mind slowly or at least very stressed.
1.I was first stressed because I hadn't gone to gym in 3 days. And thus I felt guilty.
2.I hadn't gone to school in many days or I missed many days.
3.We have a big test that's coming up.
4.My family seems to be going down hill, just recently my sister kicked me out her room for an unknown and probably selfish reason.
5.I have to get my passport soon.
6.I missed Korean Lessons on Thursday.
7.I haven't blogged in a while.
8.I've been spending a lot time online and on fanlistings-in general.
9.Only freaks like kpopsecrets and raid my minibar make me happy.

Wow, writing that made me feel relieved. But I have one more thing!
10.It's now 3:56 and I'm still not asleep!